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Author Topic: The Robot Factory  (Read 1182 times)


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The Robot Factory
« on: March 27, 2015, 09:42:44 am »
My name is Dan Apiro and I used to work for Circuits and More, Inc.  This is the story of how I saved the world.

 I worked on the production floor of Circuits and More as a stamping operator.  Basically I would inspect the automatic operation of 12 machines under my maintenance route, making sure that they were oiled up, had enough raw material, and were in perfect working condition to run until the next time I would inspect them.  The parts that were created from my machines were eventually used in larger electronics.  My machines made that little springy thing in the middle of your toaster, or the metal doohickey in the center of your vacuum cleaner motor.

 It was an easy job.  Labor-intensive, sure, but not exactly mentally-taxing, if you know what I mean.  I worked alone for the most part.  I didn't have to interact with anyone else in the factory really.  Just my machines.  Once in awhile my boss would check up on me, but as long as everything was running smoothly, I was left alone.  Sometimes for weeks at a time. 

 So you could say I had a lot of time to think about things and observe the things in the plant around me.  And I am sure glad I did, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to save the world.  I will explain.  It was on a rainy day when a black limo rolled up to the doors of the factory.  We don't usually get limousines pulling up to our little plant, but apparently whoever inside was extra special.  Two men dressed in black suits and sunglasses walked right in.  Who wears sunglasses on a rainy day?

 I skirted away from the window with my curiosity peaked.  I had to find out what was going on.  This was certainly a mystery.  I saw them men walk down the main hallway and upstairs.  They must be headed to the boss's office to talk "business."  Usually the boss would receive visitors from trade professionals trying to sell him the latest state-of-the-art stamping machines.  That's how I got Bessy (the Stampmaster ZX-45) and Trudy (the Stampall C-2500) who never failed on me once yet.  Juggs always crapped out after 4 days of operation.  I would put in 5 ounces of clean, filtered engine oil each time, and sure enough, he'd spit that out as if he held it in for months!

 Hmm, so how I was to find out what the men in the black suits came to talk to the boss about?  Simple.  Whenever the boss had guests, he'd order lunch in and they would eat in his conference room.  I was ready.  When the delivery guy came, I took the food and went straight up to the office and offered to set up the food in the conference room.  Jeanine didn't mind when I offered to do it.  Worthless receptionist; she can go on reading the USA Today at her desk.  That tabloid shouldn't even be called a "newspaper" what with all the lies it tries to spread.

 I got the food all set up and knocked on my boss's door.  "Food's here!" I called.  The men shuffle into the conference room and I "shut" the door behind me as I leave.  I can hear some small talk and some jokes through the door. of the men in black said, "So remember, this is our secret.  With your parts produced here, we will have eyes across the entire globe and no one will know any better!  We will be rich men, with global influence!"  Then I heard maniacal laughter coming from everyone in the room. 

 The door flew open as my boss yelled, " Hey 'Piro, we need napkins!  Oh, you're still here."  I shuffled my feet quickly and gave him some napkins before darting back to the production floor.  I couldn't believe what I had heard.  What were they plotting?  Global influence?  Eyes across the globe?  Getting rich?  Keeping it a secret?  There was no way this was anything short of a sinister scheme in the works.  Was it a plan to build a global "big brother" network under their control?  Were they going to develop some spy satellite that they sell to the highest bidder?  Whatever it was, it sounded like this manufacturing plant was ground zero.  The parts for whatever they were going to build were going to be produced right here.  From this plant.  From the machines.  From MY machines. 

 I couldn't just sit idly while I let this happen, now could I?  This was about to be the single most life-changing event I had ever made.  I went to the plumbing storage rack and grabbed a 4-foot long metal pipe.  Gripping it with two hands I went about my usual maintenance route.  But instead of checking the oil - instead of tightening the belts - instead of greasing the rollers, I took the pipe and started smashing.  Each and every machine.  Smashing them each to bits and bolts.  Sorry Bessy!  Whack!  Whomp!  Sorry Trudy - you had the smoothest gears.  Thump!  Crush!  Ah Juggs, I hated you anyway! 

 "Dan!  Dan!  Stop!"  My boss was there.  Livid.  I dropped the pipe and ran as fast as I could.  I felt like a free man.  I ran out the door and into the open air.  I had just saved the world, and nothing could bring me down now.  World, you are welcome!


 The men in the black suits came down to the production floor to see what had happened and saw the damage to the machines.  "I hope this won't affect production.  We have a long list of people already wanting those eyes."

 The boss replied, "Not a problem.  Sorry you had to see this.  We have replacement machines in the back.  Like I said, this is an opportunity we can't drop.  Giving the blind a chance to see again...that's nothing short of a miracle.  I just never imagined that my little metal parts would be used in something so amazing as a robotic eye."
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Re: The Robot Factory
« Reply #1 on: March 31, 2015, 01:47:43 am »
I love delicious irony.
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